Live until you die

There is a popular song that tells us to “live like we’re dying”. Yesterday we spent the day with my sister-in-law, Julie, who is doing the opposite. She has been miraculously battling cancer for the past two-and-a-half years. She is at the point of hospice coming in once a week. We don’t know how long we get to have her here on earth with us, but her grace is making these days precious in a way. She is “dying like she’s living” so nobly. Yesterday we visited her at home, arriving about 3:30 and left around 8:30. Also there were six of her children with their families. She had been resting until we got there but was up the whole time. When I say up, I mean on her feet, in the kitchen which is where I will always picture her. We had a wonderful time together; children playing, big kids playing volleyball, others just sitting together visiting or making guacamole in the kitchen. It is always so nice to be at the Charlesworths. So normal.
The past few days Julie hasn’t been able to eat or even drink without vomiting. That’s the reality. But she continues to put others first. She is very open about what is going on, and when her kids ask her how she’s doing she’ll tell them but as she and Allan are experiencing they just don’t really know. There isn’t anything to tell them what to expect. She is writing her own ending the way she wants it to go. Later in the evening she disappeared for a little bit. Allan mentioned that they were expecting a call. I guessed it would be the doctor returning their call. It turns out that she had started vomiting up blood. As with everything else they don’t really know what that means. It is a change and can’t be too good but they really don’t know what it means. I guess I said that.
I am getting to the age where I think about my own death. I hope that I can live until the day I die. I am glad that Julie is able to live until she dies, at least so far. I also hope that I can live like Julie lives. She has taught me so much about loving and taking care of others. She is a wonderful wife, mother, grandmother, mother-in-law, daughter, sister, and sister-in-law. All of her family knows it and appreciates it.